Author - Clay Corvin

I Samuel 8:4-7 Then all the elders of Israel gathered together and came to Samuel at Ramah; 5 and they said to him, “Behold, you have grown old, and your sons do not walk in your ways. Now appoint a king for us to judge us like all the nations.” 6 But the thing was displeasing in the sight of Samuel when they said, “Give us a king to judge us.” And Samuel prayed to the LORD. 7 The LORD said to Samuel, “Listen to the voice of the people in regard to all that they say to you, for they have not rejected you, but they have rejected Me from being king over them.

Samuel had spent his entire life totally dedicated to the Lord. Now, foolish, immature Israel was impugning his master’s love and faithfulness. Would God wipe them out? Would Samuel get a chance to intercede as Moses did? Samuel was given a chance to change, called to obedience and name a king. The Hebrew for this is WOW.

I love my work. It nourishes me and indeed as with so many that live to work much of my identity is tied up in my work, Business manager, homeless mission pastor, Bible land traveler, writer and student of the Word. Note that I did not claim to be a scholar. Dennis Cole is, Ken Keathley is, Walter Brown is and so too many of you.

In my work I have discovered that there are times that I attempt to parley my faithfulness to the Lord’s work for certain “insider” information on where we (God and me) are going. I must confess that I am repeatedly amazed at what the Lord is up too.

I cringe at change. I hide from new responsibilities. I whine when I am in the dark. Out of my desperation I find that the Lord has done a new work in me. I am stronger. I am kinder. I listen better. I empathize with those that are hurting. I learn to care for those that don’t care for me.

Every time that I find myself in freefall, crying “Lord what are you doing?” I discover more about myself. What love the Father has for me. What concern for the smallest need He has. Desperately I want to grow and at the same time fear the change that will be wrought in me. Now at this time in my life I find myself at a point where I am reluctantly recognizing that His change is coming if I am faithful. I want to know Him more.

OH DARK NIGHT COME

Oh dark night come
I want to grow
Come and change me
Make me whole

And yet I fear
That which is dear
May lose its hold
And leave me here

Do not o night
Let me drift
Away from things I know
Clasp my soul

I seek to control
And in control
Discover the truth
I am not in charge

But in the mist
I cannot remove
I find the change
So dearly sought

Pain and heartache
Evil I refrain
Cleanses me from habits
Presenting me new and changed

Again I am whole
A new me unfolds
Until the bell is tolled
O dark night of my soul

Clay Corvin 8/18/04

Psalm 51:3-4 For I know my transgressions, And my sin is ever before me. 4 Against You, You only, I have sinned And done what is evil in Your sight, So that You are justified when You speak And blameless when You judge.

I like for people to think well of me. I want to be recognized as a paragon of virtue and a role model to follow. I want my prayer life to be successful, and indeed would not turn down the opportunity to perform a few miracles.

Notice the I. Too often I commend myself to the Lord and command those around me. It seems that I can quickly resort to exalting my ego and forgetting that I am first and foremost a slave of the Lord Jesus Christ. And yet when we measure sin in individuals I must confess that I am the chief of sinners.

I am so blessed and so immature, so useable and yet so quickly useless. My ego compels me, my insecurities blind me and for good measure my faith is weak.

Then as quickly as I am convicted I am pardoned. Jesus is my king. Jesus is God’s everything. Jesus saves me from my sin. Jesus enables me to serve again. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

ALL OF US SIN

I cannot deny my sin
It holds me near
Confusing me
As I seek to be free

I do the things
I say I won’t
And walk the lanes
I swear I don’t

The sickness comes and goes
I waver on broken toes
Never able to run the race
I always fall on my face

Then the Lord came looking
His love had my name
He said He had a vaccine
That would free me from this pain

Whosoever will can come
He said my freedom was done
In Christ I am complete
By grace He destroys defeat

Victory is mine
I am free from my bind
Each move I make is a choice
And Christ will keep me free

Clay Corvin 8/19/04

Jeremiah 29:11 ‘For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.

Discouragement is a spiteful taskmaster. There is always that still small voice that contests every victory, and clouds every campaign. We begin reliving our service and then the boo bears arrive, you could, should, if you only would have done it better. Where you are is unimportant. No one even cares how hard you are trying.

Feet of clay is a universal experience. The pain and chaos of life will make sure that we question our ministry, our faithfulness and our holiness. In addition to that the surprises of life, real surprises, will cause us to question our value and worth.

The solution is Jesus. I can truthfully say that Jesus is my best friend. I am painfully striving to cultivate a commitment to constant conversation with Him. Asking Him to change my moods, close my mouth, give me wisdom and equip me to do the next right thing. Jesus gives me direction and encouragement, a future and a hope. God really cares for me.

MY FUTURE IS SECURE

I’ve wandered all my life
Giving advice
Seeking gain
Even thinking of fame

Who will remember?
What I’ve done
Can I be important?
Is it worth the run?

All around are people
More successful than me
They seem to prosper
As failure enshrouds me

Sin is always present
Words seldom right
China dolls are breaking
As I turn left then right

The problem isn’t service
If my service counts
Delivery is my issue
Are my actions heaven sent?

Then I squirm and scramble
Lord look what we’ve done
It seems I’ve missed your message
No one has won

Then the words of Jesus
Reach into my heart
The Father says I’m worthy
I’ve been faithful to the Son.

Clay Corvin 8/20/04

What do you want from life?
Knowledge
So that you can give advice
And be in charge

Knowing all the evil
Hearing all man’s fears
Knowledge makes us fearless
And often unable to hear

Maybe power is your thing
Controlling others
Demanding things
Overwhelmed with goods

Sickness quickly destroys
Powers sense of strength
Behind the world’s controlling
A little man on the brink

We walk and talk of issues
Life is what we want
How to grab the gusto
And live without a think

I want and I have and soon I will be
Rhymes we make to soothe
The truth is death is coming
I don’t when it will unfold

I want to be of value
Important where I am
Able to see my condition
As worthy of who I am

Jesus says surrender
Give my your heart
I will fill you with value
And worth will overflow your heart

What will you do?
When the things you see
Deny your life
Hold you in strife

No breaks
No chance
Life is a dance
And you don’t know the tune

Do you count?
Are you here?
Or is your life
Just some cosmic jeer

Have you reached?
Out for help
And heard the words
Help yourself

Are you the one?
That feels the pain
Of walking life
Down the drain

Can you be?
What your mind sees
A valuable one
With a memorable name

Yes you can
Your Father calls
Come to me
Give me your all

When you turn
To Jesus Christ
Eternal life
Strength for strife

A heart that is new
A friend that is true
Wisdom to fight
A life that is right

Jesus thinks of you
Knows your name
Feels your pain
Taking you to the Father
You belong to Him

Your life in Christ
Changes everything
You have a friend in God
Listening as you speak
He will guide your feet

Inside of you is fear and pain
Jesus knows your need
He will spend time with you
Helping you grow
Away from the pain you know

Joy looks for you
Out of time with Christ
Lining out your life
Reminding you
The Father loves you

Daily you come near
To listen to the Word
As you read and hear
The Father has a job for you
Someone desperately needs you

They need to hear
What you now find dear
Your fellowship with the Lord
How He ministers to you
The way that He leads you

Everything you need
Is found in Jesus heart
Spend time with Christ
He will roll back the night
Your life will be a joy

Your need
Man’s greed
Ignoring you
Destroying you

Little care
No helping hand
You try so hard
And lose again

Jesus comes to change the world
Giving you a place
Filling you with grace
Giving you what you need

A chance to hear
An ear for need
The Father holds you dear
He will listen as you plead

His strength will come
To help you learn
The way to walk
How to talk

Talk to fears, trouble and woes
Unwilling to lose again
Knowing you can win
Christ has entered in

Into your heart
Into your life
Value and worth
And good advice

Actions change
To give you fame
With Christ the Lord
He knows your name

And now the path
You choose to walk
Will bring you life
You will not get lost

Need and pain
Fight to gain
Complete control
Of all you know

Jesus comes
Healing pain
Meeting needs
Enabling your gain

Now you see
You were lost
You claimed life
In Jesus Christ

His life rebuilds
Giving worth
Guiding you
You are new

New in Christ
New in life
Daily growth
Strong advice

The way you walk
Brings you near
The Father hears
You have His ear

Alive and strong
No more alone
Joy comes
Soon you’ll go home

Sin is everywhere we look
It rages in the world
Sin was so bad
Christ had to come
To offer God’s love
To you and me

Jesus cared enough
He paid my price
Giving me life
When death was deserved
Willing to sacrifice
To give me a new life

Jesus is God’s everything
In Christ I can be free
He controls the future
The Lord of all
Called all
He seeks to save you and me

Christ comes uniting
Giving man a chance
In Christ we find each other
Uniting where we split
So that we will not suffer
Or be left alone to face death

In Jesus I have life
In Jesus I belong to God
In Jesus I have what I need
To live and serve
And be what I can be
Living life abundantly

It wants to be god
To declare the way
People should live
How they should pay

In its wake is poverty
Hate and evil rule the day
Only a few have their way
The rest of us will starve

The world condemns Jesus
Because He is King
The Holy One who came
And died for me

Christ is Lord
And Lord of all
Eternal love
He will not fall

The world is dying
Every day
Overrun by ignorance
From foolish man

The world divides everyone
The rich and poor
The hungry ones
And breaks each man’s heart

The helpless are killed
The wealthy won’t live
The world builds a place
That no one leaves alive

Death and destruction
Both hold sway
Without Jesus
There will be no new day.